after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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