evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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