You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Randomize
