hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
just tell him i said nine months
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize