when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
