my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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