thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
