dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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