Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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