the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Randomize
