So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
