walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize