SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
