I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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