Sry I called you an 8
We got so high we made milksteak
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
