He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
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