The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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