im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
