ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
