Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
