wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
