Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Randomize
