Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
