yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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