You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
