His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
