So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
