i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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