Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
