i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
