why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
