I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
