haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
