my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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