i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
