Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize