Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
