But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
