is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
