I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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