all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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