I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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