Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
