they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
