You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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