I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
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