can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
