OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
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