Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
ttyl tear gas
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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