I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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