I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
